How comfortable are you with “not knowing”? 

How comfortable are you with “not knowing”? How compassionate are you with yourself in that space?

We often find ourselves in this liminal space of knowing and “not knowing” – not knowing what to do, not knowing what the future will bring, or not having clarity about our goals or our vision.  The liminal space is that edge of wanting to jump into action vs. holding back, waiting to gain clarity. Our job, part of our development journey, is to learn to sit with the discomfort of not knowing.

In a recent conversation with some colleagues, one person described standing with outstretched arms with 2 friends holding each hand, perhaps holding her back from jumping into action – because she was itching to take action.  She felt that there might be something to learn in NOT jumping into action, and she was there for it. What a perfect image: a tightrope walker, walking on the edge. How have you experienced yourself walking on that edge? What did the way forward represent to you?

When I’m standing on this edge, I know that I sometimes try to figure out the future in my head, i.e. “If I could just figure it out, I’ll be able to take action.” I can hear you laughing with me!! 

Which reminds me of the Antonio Machado quote: “You make your path by walking.” 

I can’t know the future, and the only way forward is to walk forward and watch things unfold – and trust that I’ll be ok.  I actually make a contract with myself that whatever happens, I know that I’ll learn from it – and that will be the goal, to learn, and to grow from having walked over the edge.

There is a gift to be able to sit in that liminal space.  It’s kind of a mindfulness exercise – feel what it’s like to be in that space and ask what learning there might be in this moment. Or you could just ask 2 friends to hold your outstretched hands! (smile).

How can you have compassion for yourself while you’re standing on the edge?